Did you know that the rules for thank you notes have changed? You have 3 months to write a thank you note. In a perfect world, you’d write the thank you note the day that the gift appears – and trust me, writing 2 or 3 out every day is a lot more tolerable than sitting down to a stack of 100 a few months after the big day. No longer will 1 year suffice – you need to get to it.

Thank you notes are less painful when you keep meticulous track of the Who. Open a spreadsheet and make sure that for every gift, you have captured the person or people who have given it to you, and that you have their address from your master invitation list.

The Six Step Guide

Years and years ago, The Morning News posted a life-changing article about how to write a thank you note that offered some easy-to-remember points. Late internet treasure Lesley Harpold offered six basics for writing the perfect thank you note:

1. Greet the giver.

2. Express your gratitude.

3. Discuss use.

4. Mention the past, allude to the future.

5. Grace (one more thank you)

6. Regards

This six step guide to writing thank you notes delights the recipient and keeps things easy.

The plainer, the better

On the aesthetic side, you want your thank you notes to reflect the theme of your wedding. That said, you’d hate to be stuck with hundreds of extra thank you cards that could only be used for one specific gift-giving reason. So many sites allow you to customize your stationery, you can stick with a more basic theme to use these thank yous for anything.

When I ordered my engraved invitations, I ordered a set of 200 plain cards with just the representative image from my wedding (lily of the valley) on the front, so that I could use those for any occasion. In fact, I just used one last year to thank my mom for an anniversary gift!

Handwrite your notes

It’s a shame if your handwriting is atrocious, you still have to write your thank you note by hand. Typewritten, or electronic thank you cards still can’t substitute for the mailed, hand written card.

Involve your partner

There’s no reason that only one part of the couple should be responsible for thank you note writing. In 2016 it is expected that good couples divide and conquer thank you note delivery.

Make thank you note writing fun!

We at Monogamy wines always recommend opening a bottle of Monogamy Cabernet Sauvignon before settling down to appreciate the generousity of friends and family. Other options include writing them while listening to your wedding playlist, watching your favorite show or going to a favorite restaurant or coffee shop to fill them out. There’s no reason it has to be boring or punishing.

Reward yourselves for thank you notes well done – make sure there’s a special treat planned for when the big job is done.